day 20 and the "before"

another day, another sore throat.  my mom, despite positive momentum, still is bothered by the throat (ok, tim, enough about the throat.  we got it 7 posts ago).

hey! cut me some slack.  when espn doesn't have new stuff to talk about, they run the same story about A-Rod or Tiger..... i'm just sayin'.

anyway, i was at the hospital for rounds this morning.  the doctor's visits in the room are very "routine".  it goes something like this:

doc:  "how are you feeling today?"

mom:  "ok.  my throat still hurts a lot."

doc:  "it's gonna be that way until your white blood cells come back."

mom:  "when will that be?"

doc:  "soon.  it's hard to say.  people are different.  the average person stays for about 28 day, you're on day X so BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH..."

mom: (sigh)

doc:  "any other questions?  you're looking good"

mom: "i wish my throat felt better."

doc:  "it will. any other questions?"

mom:  "no. (but my throat hurts)"

doc:  "see you tomorrow."

record that conversation and push "play" and you have the daily doctor visit.  today was a little off-script.  it went more like this:

doc:  "how are you feeling today?"

mom:  "ok.  my throat still hurts a lot."

doc:   "at least you're on the right side of the dirt."

brilliant!  

he is now an official member of the philpott family.  sarcasm and all. don't misunderstand.  he wasn't being flippant.  somehow, he knows my mom doesn't like pushing the "play" button so he punched "random".  anything to break up the routine.  i like him.

with the sore throat and fever she has been fighting, this wasn't the best day for my mom.  the good days are outnumbering the bad, but this wasn't one of the good days.  maybe tomorrow.  she didn't get her hair cut off today.  she wanted me to take a picture of the "before".  she said it was ok to post.  so i did. the hair will come off on wednesday, i'm sure.  stay tuned for the after.

one of my friends from growing up in forest park suggested i read the book "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch.  i was at the bookstore today and looked for it. it's a children's book (or it's in that section).  after i read it, i bought it and shared it with my mom. it should be required reading for every son who loves his mom.  i think i may get a copy for my brothers (and maybe my kids).  thanks, mary jo.

thanks for the prayers and support.

"We're all born bald, baby"

- Telly Savalas

blessings,

tim

p.s.  mrs. swisshelm, commenting on the blog is pretty straight-forward.  i have confidence in you.  your cards are wonderful and my mom loves them, but i know you can conquer the technology and post a comment.   click on # comments at the end of the message.  write your message in the box that comes up.  choose Name/URL from the "Comment as" drop down menu.  it will ask for a name and url.  enter your name (leave url blank) and hit "continue".  then hit "post comment".  hope that works.

the wait is on...

short and sweet today (like my mother).

generally a good day.  my mom's energy is focused on making her mouth and throat better.  her being able to swallow is what is standing in the way of her getting off her IV nourishment.  you know your throat is sore when drinking cold liquids hurts. more crucial is that it is inhibiting her ability to talk on the phone much.  imagine char philpott at a loss for words....if i haven't been seeing it, i wouldn't believe it.  she does most of her talking now in her sleep.

the pastoral forces were at work today as my mom got visits from our senior pastor and rabbi elena.  those always perk her up a little.  i saw her for a while this morning.  for those of you in the pool, the hair will be out tomorrow.  she probably would have had them shave her head today but she promised one of the patient care assistants that she could shave it tomorrow.  she wanted it shaved today but was determined to stand by her word.  

now....more waiting.  ever since we were kids, waiting has been hard.

"I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the morning."

- J. B. Priestley

many blessings,

tim

long live the queen.....

i mentioned that my parents go to the same church that we do.  today, like the last couple sundays, my dad went to the hospital instead of church (he still gets his prayers in - trust me). so i'm standing with the rest of the choir in the narthex waiting to process into the 11:00 service when my cell phone rings. my cell phone NEVER rings on sunday morning.  i look at the caller id and see it's the hospital calling. geesh....must be something wrong. as i said, my dad KNOWS that at 10:59 i'm ready to go.  i miss the call.  crap.  i dial the hospital room back.  busy.

double crap.  i call again.

my dad answers.  everything is ok.  the doctor had been in and had shared the results of my mother's bone marrow test.

CLEAN.....BABY!!!!

i should have recognized the tired relief in my father's voice.  i also should have recognized the excitement.  if you know my father, excitement doesn't always "show" with him.  i could tell you stories.......but, alas, i digress.

as you can imagine, the news was a huge relief for my mother (and father). another step towards recovery.  a BIG step.  i was only at the hospital for a short time today.  maggie and i stopped by to take my dad to a celebratory lunch.  i'll learn more about the next steps tomorrow.

i will never doubt that the prayer and thoughts of all of my mom's friends (and friends of friends) played a HUGE part in the positive step.  there have been a few times in the last few weeks when the cards/prayers were the biggest things encouraging her to fight like she has.  

maggie and i looked for a purple beret at the mall today.  the nurses have forecasted majority of hair loss by tuesday. (sorry no pictures) we couldn't find any good looking purple hats (my mom loves purple things).  i'll have to go on the internet and order something like the picture above.  maggie wants to get it personalized for her.....we can take suggestions there, too.  i'm thinking "char-baby" or "playa".  anyone?

thanks for the prayers and support.  the journey isn't over, but positive steps feel great.

"The greatest wealth is health"

- Virgil

i feel like the richest man in the world.  long live the queen.....

blessings,

tim

blood clots, hair and happiness

not much happens on the weekends in the hospital.  it's kinda like they push the "hold" button until monday.  sure, the nurses are great and medicine still gets distributed, although the nurses are a little less familiar and everything seems to be in slow motion.  

so went another saturday for my mom.  today was a good day.  she was able to clear a couple of the blood blisters/clots in her mouth (eew, gross) and they didn't bleed again.  you can't begin to understand how exciting that is for her.  so much of the ongoing pain she has is associated with how raw her mouth has been.  hopefully, things are looking up.

it looks like it will be monday when they get the remainder of the bone marrow test results.  the doctor had a few today but, without the others, didn't want to make any firm commitments although the partial he had seen has been "promising".  (i don't understand this doctor stuff)  see my mother-in-law's comment on yesterday's post for her opinion of test results.

the high part of the day, really, was my brother, chris, getting my dad a new laptop and wireless router. my mom was excited about how happy he was.  it's her birthday present for him.  (i reminded her that i use Macs and my birthday is in november).

the mail doesn't get delivered on saturdays, but i was able to pass on some nice emails and comments to her.  that is always fun.  thanks again.

i hope the throat continues to get better.  she is starting to lose her hair.  if you didn't know her, you really can't tell, yet.  if you have seen her everyday, you can tell.  she wanted me to take a picture of her with hair because "the grandkids want to see me lose my hair".  i hadn't heard that.  i'll get a picture tomorrow and ask her if i can post it.  if not, i'll just post this picture of her when she was younger.  she had great hair then, didn't she?

ok, that may have been over the line....sorry, kids.  i'm just happy she felt better today.

"Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory."

- Albert Schweitzer

many blessings,

tim

Queen Charlotte

when exactly did "bowel movements" lead the list of conversations i would have with my mother?  maybe if i was 3.  how about with the oncologist?  that's how i started my day.  her progress, apparently, takes many forms. (pun intended)

i decided to drag my butt to the hospital early this morning.  i had the pleasure of being there at about 7:15 when the nurse shift changed.  no less than 3 nurses (who weren't my mom's) stopped by to say hello and "check-in" on my mom before they went home.  my mother seems to draw everyone in to her world.   they call her Queen Charlotte.  when she is sitting in the chair with her pillows propping up her arms, magic wand in hand, she does look a little regal.  (i'll deny it if you tell her i said it.)

my mom's pneumonia continues to be a problem for her.  she has a sharp pain in her left side.  it is keeping her from doing hardcore breathing exercises and, generally, making her a little more miserable.  pain medicine is her friend.

no word on the bone marrow test today.  they said "maybe" friday so it wasn't a total surprise.  her oncologist is "on" this weekend so he'll be around.  hopefully, we'll find out something soon.  while she doesn't mention it, i'm sure it's on her mind.

thanks, again, for the thought and prayers.  i'm not sure i can ever thank people enough.

i'll try.

"The only people with whom you should try to get even are those who have helped you."

- John E. Southard

many blessings,

her majesty's (humble) servant

more pneumonia...

for as long as i can remember, my mom has been prone to pneumonia.  today, her pneumonia worsened.  a chest x-ray confirmed that her left lung, in particular, has re-developed pneumonia.  this has brought about a new drug and a sharp pain on her left side.  she continues to face a series of small "hurdles" on her road to recovery.  the doctors have increased her regular pain medication to deal with this (and her continual throat pain).  of course, this has brought on more "lively" conversations.  if you thought my mom said funny things without drugs, you should hear her now.  i think she may have bought another piano.....

during my visit today, she decided to call the folks at work.  just talking to them seemed to cheer her up and let her re-connect with the "goings-on" of the ABLE/GED program.  i've never REALLY understood what she does at work.  it turns out there is a website that explains it.  who knew?  all i know is that the students/staff there has sent some of the nicest thoughts/cards/prayers to my mom.  i think my brother, todd, stopped down there today.

my mom is anxiously awaiting the results of her bone marrow test.  the doctor hopes to have results on friday.  i think i'll try to go to the hospital early so i can be there when the doctor does his rounds.  the results will determine whether they got all of the "bad stuff" in her blood or whether they need to do more chemo.  

i got a chance to go to choir practice tonight and update everyone on my mom. my parents have been going to the same church for the last few years and my dad actually sings in the choir as well.  they have been great with their thoughts and prayers and continue to look for ways to support my parents.  

please pray for my parents as they get this "news" about their next phase of the journey. not just prayers for good outcomes, but prayers for strength no matter the outcome. 

"Always remember, there is more strength in you than you ever realized or even imagined.  Certainly nothing can keep you down if you are determined to get on top of things and stay there."

- Norman Vincent Peale

many blessings and thanks,

tim

Grandmother's Hugs and Magic Wands

she almost got me to cry tonight.  almost.

you might remember a few days ago, my cousin sent a picture of my mother's grandmother.   tonight, after my dad left, i got to hear about my great-grandmother and what a wonderful, kind, loving person she was.  "she gave the best hugs ever". i could totally see the love my mother was feeling in her tired eyes.  a hint of melancholy but mostly a general fondness for days (and people) gone by.  i wonder what my kids will say about my mom in 65 years. probably the same thing.

(she almost got me again)

she had her bone marrow test today without any incident. while drugs certainly played their part, she says the test spot from 16 days ago still hurts worse.  along with the bone marrow test, she got some more blood and platelets.  dracula would be envious of her "diet". throw in some pain medicine for her throat and tylenol for her recurrent fever and you have the pharmicist's "project" that is my mother these days.  hopefully, we'll get the (positive) results of the bone marrow test on friday.

probably the high point of the day (not counting my visit) was getting the princess wand (pictured above).  early in her hospital stay, nurse becky was carrying a "magic wand" during morning rounds.  since that day, my mother has coveted it. my dad got my mother her own wand today.  it makes a special "magic healing noise".  she waves it a lot.

nighttime could be the most difficult time for my mother.  she feels most alone.  it's quiet and she sleeps on and off.  what must she think?  i hope the thoughts and prayers of her family and friends are heard. they are needed.  before i left tonight, i waved the magic wand over her.  i know it helps.

"I had become, with the approach of night, once more aware of loneliness and time - those two companions without whom no journey can yield us anything" - Lawrence Durrell

blessings,

tim